God put me on this earth for a reason. I didn't always know this, but I never doubted it. Sometimes I have to remind myself that His purpose is greater than mine, since I don't read the Bible and can't just think of the verses on my own. Must I remind.
Yes, lately I've been dreaming big things. Like that it's possible to be a good role model and to believe in the future. And that doesn't scare me like it used to, back when I felt powerless...guess I've received SOME validation along the way and it makes me feel better. Less alone in my striving.
I didn't think at this young age (no, I'm not like the "new 20's" or anything gay and in denial like that), I'm 35. I didn't suspect that I could look back on my life with clarity, until I actually died. But I can see now, how everything happens for a reason, even the especially good stuff, even the stuff you didn't know was bad.
It strengthens you when you finally see it, in fact it's a relief. Because you can keep moving forward then, energy intact, restored where you lost it. Knowing that all God wants for any of us is to follow His plan. To follow His path.
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